Thursday, January 11, 2007

"It's not that I'm lazy. It's that I just don't care." - Peter Gibbons(Office Space)

Recently listened to a great discussion on the radio about ways men exhibit true laziness. Not irresponsible laziness....but funny, goofy laziness. Here are some I have:
  • I will wear socks for two or three days in a row instead of looking for another pair.
  • If I see a small rock on the kitchen floor, I will frequently kick it down to the basement instead of picking it up.
  • I seldomly wear mated socks
  • I prefer eating off of paper plates
  • I will sleep with my head on the dining room table instead of taking the LONNNNG walk up to my room...or even the less LONNNG walk to the living room
  • When cooking spaghetti, I will cook the entire box every time
  • While ironing my work shirts is not lazy, I usually set the iron to its hottest temp so the wrinkles go away faster. I have lost several shirts this way.
  • I will mow over virtually anything not living
  • When I have several trips to make from the back of the house to the front, I will frequently leave a can of pop halfway between, and get a drink on each pass.
  • When cooking with the microwave, I will always set the cook time to a time where both numbers are the same. For example, if I toss something in to be warmed up, I will cook multiple times for 22 seconds. This allows me to not have to move my fingers much when I set the microwave. This one really drives my wife batty.
  • Once, for about two weeks, I washed in the shower with one of those foot stones because I kept forgetting to get a rag as I walked past the bathroom dresser.
  • Yes, I take swigs straight from the milk jug.
  • Instead of looking for a comb, I will use my fingers to comb my hair.
  • No, I will not urinate while taking a shower. I do have my limits.
  • I once watched the same kids movie three times instead of changing the channel simply because I couldn't find the remote.
  • I frequently dust the living room using the sleeve of my sweatshirt. Just didn't feel like walking into the kitchen and getting a rag.

Am I alone here?? Do others go to extremes to simply avoid doing something? Is laziness like this cross-gender? I can't think of too many ways Mrs. is like this....except possibly when cooking. Instead of looking for a recipe, she has been known to wing it....usually not good.

Post a Comment

Meet The New Boss - Same As The Old Boss

Remember when this blog used to be your go-to source for juvenile stories focusing on bathroom experiences, weird personal encounters, and a...