Distractions

I am finding myself working extra these days.  This extra work is taking me to Borders, Starbucks, Paneras, etc.  This works out pretty good for me, since we could use the additional money.....and I need to be around to pick up son #2 after swimming practice.

Anyway, as I work in these places I usually wear headphones and listen to XM online.  However, I still find myself picking up bits and pieces of conversations around me.   Some of the "bits" I have heard make me laugh out loud.  I hope, in the context of their full conversations, these made sense.   And, yes.  I have a Word document where i am keeping track of these.

Here is a sampling of recent quotes:

1. No, you will wear the blindfold tonight.
   
2. If I get any more pee splashed on me I am going to scream.  (hopefully, a doctor, nurse, or some other caregiver)
3. I gave him 3 days to get the lizard out of the house.....or I am throwing it in the oven.
4. The hemorrhoids make it a lot harder
5. Yes, he was picking his nose.
6. I typically try to visit more intellectual establishments.  
7. Did you fart again?

And my favorite.....

1. So, you have already spoken to Dr. Dick?

I lost it on that one.

I guess I need to turn the volume up more.