Monday, October 16, 2006

Creativity is the ability to introduce order into the randomness of nature. - Eric Hoffer

Over the past few months I have been collecting little tidbits of stories, some from the near past, others from my distant childhood. None hold enough to be a complete post. But they are funny enough to warrant a mention. So, once again we stroll down randomness lane.....

  • Growing up, one of my neighbors looked exactly like Mr. Hooper (of Sesame Street fame). One day, as we were cleaning my folks' yard, I asked my brother-in-law to go ask the neighbor if we could borrow his tiller. Of course, my brother-in-law had only heard me refer to the neighbor as Mr. Hooper. After a few minutes he came back and said that the neighbor was a jerk. When asked why, he said, "I kept calling, Hey Mr. Hooper, but he never turned around."

  • The first movie that really spooked me was Jaws. When the head popped up I just about filled my pants. The next one was the original Halloween.

  • I really love watching a movie in a theatre with someone who is a screen talker. I know it annoys most people...but I think it is hilarious.

  • It seems I am having an ongoing battle with an elderly lady who works at a local Quiznos. She gets unnecessarily ticked when someone does anything to make the place "disorganized". For example, if someone picks up a bag of chips, then places it back on the shelves in the wrong place, she will make a bee line over, in a huff, and put it back where it belongs. So, I make it a point to: put at least three bags in the wrong places, move my chair at the table out of the symmetric two on each side configuration, and occasionally dump my pan into the trash as I leave....right in front of her, with a little wink. Yes, I am a huge a-hole.

  • On my last trip I experienced something in an office's restroom I hadn't experienced before. As I walk in, two stalls are occupied. While I am standing, doing "my business", I hear one staller let loose an incredible fart. Both he and the guy in the next stall chuckle. Farter then says, "top that". To which, the other replies, "On its way" and then rips one that is even more "impressive". Both chuckle....and the battle continues. I know I have tossed this question out before....but does this type of thing ever happen in a women's restroom?

  • My soccer team ended up 3-2 this season. Considering we played several teams made up of mostly 6th graders, and I had almost all 4th and 5th graders, I think it was a pretty good season. Most importantly, one little boy who had never scored a goal before got his first goal. Made me feel so good to see his reaction.

  • Dora the Explorer is a pretty good show.

  • However, I just can't take the Wiggles.

  • It sure was fun talking WWF/WCW/WWE/ECW/.... wrestling with one of my bosses and a coworker as we drove to Parsippany. Oh, the memories of Dick the Bruiser, The Crusher, The Ox, The Valiant Brothers, Ted DiBiase, The 4 Horsemen, The Big Cat Ernie Ladd, Ric Flair, Andre The Giant, The Bushwhackers, George "The Animal" Steele, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, The Iron Sheik, Nicolai Volkov, The Rock and Roll Express......

  • Hey, T Kirby. Still liking your underwater Pier-Cam.

  • I am liking my memory-foam pillow.

  • Still find myself connecting many of my real life events with episodes of Seinfeld. Pretty sad, isn't it?

  • I'm not sure how I can let my kids go anywhere when all I hear about anymore is one horrific /despicable act against kids after another.

  • I have seen a lot of people wearing Crocs while I have been in airports lately. Anyone out there own a pair? Are they really that comfortable?

  • Kids still love the good old Cut-and-Bake cookies.

  • Just bought a new notebook wireless mouse for my computer. A Microsoft Wireless Notebook Optical Mouse 4000. Has a simple USB stick receiver. Works very nicely.

  • I still clearly remember the day one of my buddies bet me I couldn't hit a bird's nest way up in the top of a tree with a walnut. I was given 3 chances. On the second one I somehow nailed the bottom of the nest (a solid 70 feet in the air). Unfortunately, what was supposed to be an abandoned nest (it was the fall....don't all birds migrate?) was full of baby birds. All I saw were baby birds flying in five directions. I felt so bad afterwards I went home and sat in my room for the rest of the day.

  • Are the arts of smashing pumpkins and soaping windows passé?

  • I like Neil Cavuto.


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