Monday, March 17, 2008

Goodbye, Old Friend

It is tough saying goodbye to an old friend. One that you grew up with. One that has been there for the tough times as well as the good times.

Unfortunately, as of tonight, I have to say goodbye to one of my best friends.

Goodbye, steak.

I know it seems drastic. But, the deal was sealed tonight. For tonight was son #2's swim team awards banquet. As Mrs. WHW was unable to go, I was going it alone with JL. The program was at a local steak place. Not just any steak place....but one where you pick the steak, you grill the steak, and you eat the steak; along with ample amounts of Texas toast, salad bar, bake potatoes, and Pepsi.

I had not been here for quite some time. I used to love easting here. When I was on my own, and lived off of happy hour food, this place's steak kabobs were the best. Those and the 24 oz beers.

Anyway, tonight I splurged. I got a nice big steak and enjoyed it. Bigger than I probably should have gotten....ok, drop the probably.

Afterwards, I had to run over to Best Buy and to Kroger before arriving home. Unfortunately, about 5 miles from home the human 2 minute warning hit me. JL insisted we drive the remaining miles with the windows down.

When I got home, I power-walked up the stairs. As I blew past Mrs. WHW she snickered and said something about the exhaust fan. The entire walk upstairs is still a blur to me. When you focus every portion of your mind to "flexing" the sphincter, other portions of the brain have to shut down temporarily. Just a fact of anatomy.

I won't go into gory details of the potty time....only to say I was so desperate for reading material that I asked one of the kids to bring in a couple Highlights.

Yes, that is sad.

I can no longer deal with this pain. I must say goodbye to steaks. It hurts to say goodbye, but it hurts more to lose feeling in your feet while going big potty.
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